Round the World Cruise Blog Part 1: Southampton to New York

Dislocated in time and space

After the frenzied organising, packing and getting to Southampton, the fumbling through paperwork, visas and health affidavits at check in, the almost-there-almost-there feeling of ascending the gangplank and then the sheer relief at finding the lovely little cabin (or stateroom as Cunard would have it) with its welcome note and bottle of sparkling wine - we suddenly realised that for the next seven days there would be no escaping the confines of the ship. Next stop New York. Nothing in between.

The weather in January and on the Atlantic was pretty ghastly - rainy and cold and thus offered no incentive whatsoever to venture outside. And so, we were trapped effectively indoors, on a ship for seven whole days. 

First encounter was with our cabin steward - most of the passenger facing staff choose their own names given that most passengers are not up to speed on Philippino, Urdu or Bumi Malay.  Caesar is a perennial favourite. As are Jeffrey, Mickey, Elvis, Winston and Shepherd (presumably as in The Good Shepherd). The traditional greeting is via a 20$ note which usually ensures terrific service (and in our case a mass of extra coat hangers, a memory foam pillow and an additional bottle of fizz and some Penhaligon’s hair conditioner).

We ventured forth in the English drizzle to watch the most fantastical fireworks display as two Cunard (Queens Queen Anne and Queen Mary 2) sailed forth from Southampton. Twenty minutes of the most spectacular fireworks imaginable. A glass of champagne (well, almost certainly prosecco or cava) in hand and the prospect of the journey of a lifetime. Makes a lifetime of work seem well worth the slog.

Thereafter, the skies were leaden, the rain either relentlessly heavy or blowing blustery squalls which lashed waves against the lower restaurant windows. The seas were swollen and choppy resulting in a mad rush on the acupuncture anti seasickness wrist bands as well as long queues of (mainly) hardy wives at the Pursers desk pleading for the heaviest duty medication for their whey faced husbands. Those left standing and sensibly glued to the inside lounges, sank back in the sofas, clutching their cappuccinos and watched in awe and bemusement at the few deck pounders bending their puffa clad shoulders against the force 8 gale staggering around the soaking decks.

So, most of the seven-day January Transatlantic voyages in winter focus on the ship and its distractions. We have heard tell however, of transatlantic voyages in winter spent on millpond seas with glorious sunshine and meals eaten on the top deck Boardwalk restaurant. 

Where to begin - a speedy sprint around the (inside) decks to orientate oneself. Queen Mary is a wonderful rabbit warren arranged around a central atrium. Starting at the top (Deck 13) - mostly outdoor decks with sports areas, an outside restaurant for sunny days with tables and sunshades, lots of deckchairs, quoits, golf nets, short tennis and the greatest attraction on the transatlantic crossings, the Kennels. The waiting list for kennels is allegedly two years - each dog (or cat) has its own run, its own food preparation area, a walkies area both inside and outside as well as their own lamppost and fire hydrant (probably best to avoid the cabins beneath?). We discovered that walkies are around 10.30 am and there is a hardcore legion of dog lovers (I’d estimate a good quarter of the ship) who beetle up to have a pat with one of the dogs. 

Next deck down there’s a rather fine indoor pool (with retractable roof for fine days), table tennis and cabins. A poolside bar. And a golf simulator. Going on down you hit the world voyage travellers lounge area with its own concierge who can sort ‘stuff’ out. Teas and coffees, sandwiches, fruit, cream teas and cakes as well as magazines and crosswords and a fabulous view just under the bridge from the front of the ship.

Next deck down you find the splendid Commodore Club (coffees and a colossal bar). Piano and harp music in the evening. A cigar lounge, And the scene of small special interest groups (classic cars, LGBT groups, solo travellers, philosophers, hobbyists, ex and serving military personnel - almost anything). And a 275-degree panoramic window to the front. 

Beneath that is the library which is extraordinarily well equipped with fiction, reference, papers, magazines, computers and great big squashy sofas and chairs. It’s a fabulous place to go and browse frankly, anything, whilst grabbing sea views out of the windows. Relaxation and mind improvement in one easy hit! There’s a small bookshop adjacent with many books written by the cruise lecturers as well as puzzles, games and reference books.

The gyms are on Deck 7 - places of torture but stuffed full of equipment from the usual treadmills and cross trainers to weights, to wall bars, terrifying mirrors where one could (if one wanted) admire oneself contorting and striking unnatural poses. There are trainers aged about 25 with improbable physiques who claimed to be able to transform my 71-year-old frame into that of a sinewy 40-year-old. There are three adjacent rooms with, I’d guess, almost every conceivable piece of gym equipment including some which look - words elude me at this point - potentially lethal and decidedly hazardous to life. 

The passenger cabins take up most of next few floors until one gets to Deck 7. Home of the spa, the hairdresser, the beauty salons, the colossal buffet and a vast lounge which hosts quiz shows and various musicians tootling away on pianos, guitars, harps and violins.

The Spa. Not only the full range of spa treatments and tweakments involving hot stones, seaweed baths, facials and massages but a fantastic spa area with a pool that pummels and fizzes geysers of warm water where you can happily bob around. Too energetic? Lie of the super comfy recliners and read before trotting off to one of the steam rooms, the sauna, the rainforest showers (that unaccountably list London mist as an option, the reflexology foot baths and Turkish looking herbal hot rooms.

The meals. Too wonderful to do justice to……. The buffet has just about everything you could want at some point and somewhere. Some evenings are themed to the country being visited. Each evening has a roast, a curry, grills, casseroles, fish, lasagnes, pastas as well as salads galore, sushi, cold meats and on and on it goes. Soups, puddings, fruits, cheeses of every hue and gooeyness. But to be avoided at all costs if norovirus breaks out. 

The pop-ups. As the staff are largely Indian and Asian, the specialty restaurants are, for a small additional cost, utterly magnificent and as different from the UK Chinese and Indian restaurants as one could imagine. There are four restaurants that rotate every few days. The ‘Coriander’ restaurant offers five different starters (on one plate – you get ‘em all), for the main course three choices (mild chicken, lamb pasanda and a Goan fish curry) followed by Indian puddings and sweetmeats. ‘Bamboo’ gets one an Asian Bento box with Chinese starters, one of three main courses and Chinese desserts. There is also an Italian, a Mediterranean and a pasta /pizza restaurant. And all with tablecloths, candles and attentive waiters. On long cruises it makes a real difference having a change of scenery and Cunard does this very well!

Snacks - and not just any old snacks but filled croissants, pastries, Scandinavian open sandwiches - are available in quiet corners and the coffee shops. Afternoon tea is a real treat - served in the Queens room with a choice of teas, finger sandwiches, scones and clotted cream as well as pastries and cakes.

The main dining rooms are divided into Britannia, Club Britannia, Princess and Queens Grills. Each one is more luxurious than the last. The food is seriously good in each, but you only get caviar in Queens grill. Or indeed any other thing your imagination can run too. If you want the occasional top-notch meal there’s also a Steak and Fish restaurant that offers steaks, dover sole, sea food platters with lobsters, oysters and King Crab. On birthdays a special personalized cake can be ordered.

The daily programme is delivered every morning with a decent all round offering from specialist lectures (we had a psychology professor, a civil engineer, a show business photographer, a geologist, an impressionist (Rory Bremner on this occasion), a raft of quizzes, dancing lessons, bridge lessons, golf on the simulator, fencing, keep fit, art classes, craft lessons, wine tastings, technology talks, port presentations, classical and folk concerts, movies and plays. 

There’s an art gallery and the professionals running it give talks - we’ve had Art Heists, Monet, Banksy. There’s a very clear agenda to each of these talks and that is to draw attention to their artists and the unarguable need that you should buy one of the paintings on sale in said gallery. That being said, the talks are pretty interesting, and one certainly learns. On occasions, the artists they represent come aboard, handily with a few original paintings that they will sign, attach a personal dedication from her/him to the lucky purchaser and maybe have a private audience with you. Happily, for the passengers this time, the artist in question, described I think as a neo-emotionalist, is extraordinarily easy on the eye. I suspect quite a few will be attending his unveiling (the paintings! the paintings!) and not just for the bubbly. 

In the evenings, for those not exhausted by the day’s activities, there are the showstopper performances in the theatre (ranging from musicals to comedians, to plays), concerts around the ship, film nights, jazz clubs, discos and dancing in the grand ballroom (after a few lessons learning the waltz, the Cha cha cha, tango and Rumba) as well as the inevitable disco (which had, for the first time, a silent disco!!).

On Burns Night and St Patrick’s Day there are special events, meals and dances.

Obviously, there is a pub which does pub grub very well indeed. Scotch eggs, smoked haddock scotch eggs, three cheese toasties, ploughman’s, fish and chips and a daily pie. And always washed down with either sticky toffee pud or apple pie and custard. And all the usual pub distractions, sports tv, darts, a few slightly tipsy people, the solo leering drinker and folk evenings with Irish music, Scottish music, Motown, Sounds of the 70’s and 80’s.

Not one moment of boredom - just sheer sybaritic relaxation, interest and enjoyment. 

Continue Reading Our Round the World Cruise

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